Resilient women coping with returning soldiers need a plan, a strategy to help them support their loved one as he or she deals with reintegration into ‘normality’. In Part One, you dealt with setting your goals, your plans to achieve greater resilience to help your returned soldier. Part Two is about thinking and deciding whether these goals are the right ones before you move towards taking action.

Tasks

Having set your goals, herewith some tips how to start these goals.

List the major tasks needed to achieve the goal, in other words, what do you need to do to achieve these goals. Keep this fairly high level, then break down each task into manageable sub-tasks.

Should this feel like struggling, start by ‘living in the future’ – telling a story of how your life is now you have achieved your goal and describing how you got there. This description will contain your tasks as well as make it fun and creative.

Next, go through each task in turn and ask yourself the following questions. If any of the elements is missing or low, then you can say you have low ‘skill’ or ‘will’ in that area. If this is true, then consider how you can close that gap, and include it as a task.

Ability [skill]
Have I ever been taught to do this?
Is this a role I wish to have?
Do I know how to do this?
Have I ever done this, or something similar, successfully before?

Enthusiasm [will]
Do I really want to do this?
Is it in line with my personal values?
What do I benefit from this?
Am I okay with taking this level of risk?
Do I think I can do it?

This is a practical, objective method and an honest self-evaluation that will help to optimise to your achievements. Admitting you don’t know how to do something or that you are scared of doing it is not an admission of weakness. It just means you do not yet have the resources.

In Part Three you will be learning about having a strong base in all seven areas of your life.

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